this one's a fighter

source here

A few days ago I was venting to a friend that I've been working out but not seeing any results or weight loss.  His response was, "You're too hard on yourself."  I was a little annoyed.  A lot annoyed.  I think I had some good rebuttal to show that I'm so so far from my goal and I'm just being honest with myself about how far away from that goal I am.  I'm lazy and I eat too much chocolate and I'm not seeing results because I only ran 6 miles instead of 7 on Saturday.

I joined a gym last week....yay!.....and went to a yoga class tonight.  Lights off, some hippy earth relaxing music going, teacher's mono tone voice telling me to feel the energy through my fingertips and all I can think is how all the girls in the room are so gorgeous and done up in their bright pink shirts and perfect ponytails.  My stomach is feeling round. My arms are tired already?? We just started! That guy in front of me is cute.  He's probably looking at the girl to my left though cause she's cuter.  And her hair is down and all sexy curly.  Mines up in this weird bun thing.  I need to clean my room when I get home.  It's such a mess.  The girl to my right is doing a lot of resting poses, but that's okay because she's probably new. That's cool of her to stick it out even though she's tired.

It suddenly just hit me.  I'm so hard on myself.  Why am I letting this complete stranger next to me off the hook for taking a break and even giving her encouraging vibes, but I'm talking myself down in a constant stream of insults. Even during yoga - the land of "follow your body's messages, do what you can today, self acceptance and love and meditation" - and I'm criticizing how big my butt looks in the mirror during Warrior pose.

On the way home this song, The Fighter was on the radio and I just rolled my windows down, music up, and told myself I'm a fighter (cause I am) and its okay to have bad days and be tired like I was today but it was NOT okay to let those other thoughts over run my mind.  So, this one's a fighter.  Let's be nice to ourselves, k?

Just do it

Check out this motivating article

I've been lacking in motivation lately and kinda hoping I'd get in the mood to be better.  My cycle tends to be totally motivated with lots of plans and goals....to burning out, wanting to lay in bed all day.....and back again to wanting to improve.  I read the article linked above and I really liked it.  It really applies to any form of working out that you choose, not just yoga.  I'm a big believer in balance in all things and so I try to go easy on myself when I'm not in the mood to workout.  But when it comes to working out....I've never regretted doing it.  Its just that initial getting off my butt and putting my tennis shoes on thats the hardest part.  Its time to tap into my will power and be like Nike.

I Do Yoga in My Underwear

I don't know what got into me, but this morning I woke up and the first thing I did was my yoga for the day.  That's pretty amazing since I usually just turn the tv on while I ease into waking myself up, not wanting to get out of bed.  But the most amazing part about it was.........

Bind pose!  See that photo there?  Yep I nailed that pose today.   

A few years ago when I first started trying yoga I was about 35 lbs heavier and as beginner as you can get.  Most of the moves I couldn't do but just saw them as a goal to work up to.  But this pose, something about it bugged me.  I couldn't even get close to it.  I was in a class and I'd look at the girls in front of me doing it with ease it seemed.  I could bend over onto one knee (slightly) and reaching an arm under my leg and up to grasp hands......seriously? Not happening.  I felt like my hands were so far away from being able to touch that for the life of me I could not figure out how anyone did it.  I must have miniature t-rex arms.  

I tried it again today for the first time in quite awhile and was pretty shocked when I felt my fingers touch.  Wait? I'm actually doing it?  My fingertips weren't just touching.  I grabbed hands!  

I'm saying this partly to brag because I am so excited!! But mostly as a reminder that it's hard to see how far you've come sometimes when you're in it.  One thing that I love about yoga and certain other workouts is that it can be measured and it is undeniable when you've grown and improved.  I can feel my strength as I'm able to do more week after week.  If you're disappointed with where you're at now, look back at where you've been.  If you don't feel like you're farther along than where you've been, start now.  Tomorrow look back and see that you're stronger than yesterday.  

This video is INCREDIBLE.  I've got that t-rex arms mentality right now even after that speech I just gave.  But maybe....someday.....I could do something like that?  Its pretty inspiring to say the least.

I know most of my friends are brand new to yoga or new to the idea of even considering trying it.  I'm putting together some of my favorite videos and hopefully tomorrow I'll have some links for you to try out if your'e feeling adventurous.    

Happy President's day :) 

Good Things

What a GOOD day. Seriously.  It has taken me a month and 15 days before I really started feeling that rejuvenation of a new year and getting through the winter and feeling spring coming....but I feel it coming.  Because of my 30 day self love/yoga challenge in my previous post, I woke up this morning with the goal today of focusing on positive things.  Something about the phrase "self love" really stuck in my head.  It was pretty evident how hard I am on myself as each time I had a negative thought I consciously kicked it right out with the excuse that today I don't have to worry about that. Only good things. And I must say, it was very freeing.  I believe we do need some of those negative thoughts as they can be a reminder to always be improving and striving to become better than we were.  That being said, I know I don't allow enough self love to balance out the knowledge that I have so far to go.  


Some awesome things today:


---Leftover chocolate from Valentine's Day :)  Yes I'll probably be shaking from a sugar coma tonight but I feel like this still belongs in the awesome category.
---The Valentine that I got pictured above.  Pretty great eh?  My creative and awesome sister found the idea on Pinterest.   It makes me laugh.
---I finally found enough reasons to get an iphone. Awesome!  So that means that the first thing I did was signed up for Instagram.  I'm signed up as jenniferann1 if you like to follow.  Naturally I'm going to be instagraming fool so be prepared for plenty of pictures.  
---My goal of taking more pictures this year is going to be fulfilled.  Here's to crossing those resolutions off my list.  
----Did I mention I had a lot of chocolate today? And that there's still more for tomorrow?
---2nd day of yoga completed.  Check!
---Discovering the band Imagine Dragons and the following song, America, which will most definitely be added to my running/motivation playlist.

One of the girls from our great little yoga support group mentioned how self love ultimately results in being able to outwardly love. So true.  Negative thoughts consume your spirit and there's really no energy left to give to anyone else.  I love that those two go hand in hand, that as you spend energy on your own well-being, you'll have added energy to loves others.

30 Days of Yoga

I heard about a challenge of doing yoga for 30 days and recommitting to self and outward love.   Yes please!  There was a period of time that i was consistent with yoga and it did amazing things for me.  When I first started the practice I felt awkward, weak, and felt like I belonged at the back row of the class.  After about 2 weeks I started noticing changes and being able to do certain poses that I couldn't do before.  After a month or two I felt strong, beautiful, and so proud of the person I was being.  I connected with yoga and let it do amazing things for my mind and body.  Lately I've been focused on weight loss and doing other forms of exercise. While any kind of exercise is great, I'm feeling a lack of motivation.  I'm totally in a rut.  This 30 day challenge came at the perfect time for to regroup and focus on self love while I'm gaining strength.  So excited to recommit to yoga.  

A group of beautiful ladies are motivating each other through this challenge and anyone is invited to join.  Check out this blog for the source of the goal and to find other's who are committed and writing about their experiences.  You can also follow along on facebook if you want to join in the goal.  

I'm going to have a hard time doing it every single day, especially on the days when I don't feel like doing anything.  I'm committed though. 30 days. This is happening! 

Changes

Hey! So motivation kicked in suddenly and finally.  I did a little spring cleaning and finally changed the look of this here blog.  Notice anything different?  I've been struggling to make it look just how I want it while trying to learn the html language but I think I'll settle on how it is now.  I also renewed my goals of weight loss.  Current goals for me are working out 4-6 times a week and keeping my calories to a certain number.  As past trends have shown though, I'm motivated for a day or two with those goals until I ultimately talk myself into a treat, a pat on my back for doing so well the past day (or the past half a day).  Mac and cheese for lunch?  Yep I must deserve it since I worked out yesterday. That thinking happens all too often unfortunately which has the result of maintaining weight...not losing.    So since I'm more of a visual girl I made a calendar to have on my wall and account every day how I'm doing.  The new goal is to be able to check off the boxes for goals completed most days of the week.   I figure if I'm struggling to be able to check off the boxes then it'll be pretty obvious why I'm stuck at the same weight for the past 6 weeks.


Bonus.....if you have similar goals and want to have the calendars as well you sure can!  They're clickable and printable.  

I'll be adding the following months later on so check back in April if you want May and June and......

Oh January

Its that time of year, resolution time.  Have you made yours?  This is the month where the gym is crowded to the max, but just this month. Because next month most of the resolutions start to fizzle away.  In past years I've been a New Years grinch thinking that I would be better off to not set myself up for failure knowing that my goals would be given up by February.....or if I'm really enthusiastic about it until March.  Sad huh? Dumb huh? Yeah it is.  

So before I even think about my hopes for the year I'm gonna do a little 2011 celebration.  I was did some pretty awesome things.  Since last December I acquired this little thing known as a Bachelor's degree, visited a couple new countries, walked on the Great Wall of China, climbed the same steps as the monks to the top of the highest mountain I've ever dreamed to be on, improved the sales in my Etsy shop, ran 5 miles in an hour (that's FAST for me people), tried ice skating and didn't fall once (and loved it...who knew I love ice skating?), and I'm 20 lbs less than I was a year ago.  Success. Atta girl. 

So to sum up, I've kicked out the negative goal thoughts and moved on to better, more inspiring things. Even if a goal only lasts a month, I'll still be a step closer to where I wanna be.  Hopefully next time I wanna rekindle that goal I'll make it 2 months. Then 3.  Gotta keep trucking if you wanna be awesome and do awesome things.  

P.S.....I hate to say it, but I found that quote pictured above on Pinterest - I think - but I just don't remember where so I can't give credit where credit is due. If you know where it's from lemme know asap! 

Awesome Today

LuciusArt found here

Last night I was feeling motivated that in the morning I would wake up just a little bit earlier and do a 20 minute workout and be awesome.  I know right.  But I guess I forgot that I actually don't do things like that.  So my alarm went off.  And then 5 minutes later again.  And then again.  So instead I rolled out of bed at the time that I normally am walking out the door for work...oops. Ah well. It was a nice try.

So I figured once I got done with work I would make up for that work out.  Long story short I ended up in bed once again. I liked cozy a little too much. Nice try again. 

But you know those friends you have that you kinda avoid cause they're serious party pooopers. The ones who have a hard day...every day. And they love to tell you about it.  I mean every day their dog died. (How many dogs do they really have?)  I am on a mission to never be one of those friends.  Yes I know I haven't washed my jeans in awhile and they are giving me saggy butt, but its still a good day.

Awesome things today

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1. Listening to a voicemail during work of my best sister Jamie serenading me.  My laughter made my friend at work curious enough to listen in and pretty sure it made her day awesome too. 

2. My lunch.  I love food and it was good okay. 

3. Doing something right and productive and my boss acknowledging by saying and I quote, "You are awesome."  Yes, yes I am.  

4. My coworker walking in to work with a box of cookies from the best bakery. And I choose a double fudge one.  I told you, I love food.

5. Some guy was walking around Walmart with pieces of kleenex stuck up his nose.  You know when you have a bloody nose and you're laying in bed with your head propped up nose stuffed with kleenex feeling not so sexy.  Like that. Except he was walking around Walmart. Okay maybe not so awesome but definitely noteworthy.  And courageous.  

6. Another noteworthy couple walking around Walmart sporting their British accents.  I have a definite love affair with the way they talk.  I stalked them for a little while, following just close enough to hear but stealthily enough not to be caught.  Oh how those Brits make me smile.

7. I did a little DIY project at home and it turned out pretty cool if I do say so.  I'd show ya but, I have a feeling this may turn into a Christmas project so we'll keep that under wraps until the 26th.  But lets just say I transfered a photo onto a canvas.  Pretty nifty eh?  

8. Playing soccer with Perry, my little friend that I get paid to be friends with.  He was the goalie and laughed his tiny tushie off every time I kicked it hard and nailed him with the ball. Who knew my athletic abilities against a 5 yr old were so hilarious?  

9. Hot shower before bed. Shaved legs (let's be real. Its winter and this isn't a daily thing.)  Okay confession....I was trying to type occurance on the last sentence but I can't figure out how to spell it right.  So instead I settled for the word thing.  Good replacement word.  

I hope you were awesome today too.

Wise words from Panda Express.